The first F is for FEELINGS! You know you meet a guy and he is just the best thing since sliced bread. When you think of him your eyes light up and you have this silly smile on your face and you feel euphoric when thinking about this relationship. But what happens when it's 6 months down the road and he pisses you off, your feelings change. When that person no longer meets your expectations, your feelings change. Love is not about a feeling! Love is about action. Showing the person that you are in a relationship with that you care about them, being present in the moment with them, going through the good and bad times. Love requires action not fleeting feelings.
The 2nd F is for FANTASY! As women, we have all at some point visualized our wedding to prince charming. We bought into the Disney version of life and love. You know the one, you meet prince charming, he sweeps you off your feet, you have the biggest and grandest wedding and live happily ever after. Some of us have not let go of this fantasy so we enter relationships looking for prince charming to give us this. What you end up doing is kissing a lot of frogs and being sad. The problem with the fantasy is not that we should have love and get married but that you must have the fantasy to have love. That's not how this works!
The M is for myth! I know you've heard the saying that love conquers all. The bible says love covers a multitude of sins and it does but it is not a magical band aid. You can't put a band aid on a relationship where you are being disrespected. Love can't fix that. Love can't make a person be faithful. There is a myth that if you just love a person enough they will change to meet your expectations. That is a lie. That's not how that works. You will be disappointed all the time.
When you remove FFM from your definition or expectation of love you will see and feel what real love is. Real love is self-love. LOVE YOURSELF! Love your flaws and all. When you love yourself it makes it easier for love to find you. When you stop looking for love in all the wrong places love sneaks up on you and it's amazing!
Here's to loving yourself and being fabulous!
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